Note to self?
At this point in my life, I’m losing sight of all the things worth living for.
Day by day, I look for reasons why I should stay.
But still, I make sure I don’t look close to what I actually feel. Making jokes, laughing, trying to get as adventurous as I can be. I distract myself temporarily.
Then it gets worse at night.
The lights will turn off, I will doze off. But I won’t sleep. I couldnt. The world will slowly suck all the smiles, and put just cries in my thoughts. Reasons on top of reasons of why I shouldn’t stay. I question who I am and what I should keep being, what I shouldn’t be. Still trying to figure out what I will wake up to. Why. Why I still wake up. I should be thankful for a brand new day. But I’m not. Not anymore. Now, I feel like I’m in this body, but I want to be somewhere else. I drag myself.
Happy happy happy. That’s my motto. Living life to the fullest. Surround myself with amazing people. Do things that I enjoy. Then in those moments, I find at least something about this life that I actually live for.
The night will come again.
And then I’m reminded that this world ain’t what it used to be. It could’ve been my fault. Maybe it is my fault. And that’s what sucks.
I can’t get back up.
I don’t think it’s any of your business..
9 pictures of Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups asked by moi
Isn’t it weird to think there’s so much pressure on you to get into a good school and be good looking and make lots of money and get married and have kids when eventually you’re just going to die and be left in the ground in darkness forever while worms eat your skin and nothing you did even mattered at all
i hate when people pour my cereal
they don’t know the amount of milk i like
they don’t know how much cereal i want
they don’t know me
they don’t know my life
they don’t know what i been through